Saturday, October 16, 2010

Insulting, Insensitive, Infuriating...

Dear Ignorant Neighbour,

What you did and said yesterday was extremely hurtful... to be polite. I cannot believe the ignorance you displayed towards me. I wore my awareness ribbon with pride and you ripped my feelings to shreds.

You lack a sensitivity chip.

People don’t wear awareness ribbons to be trendy and cool or to have something to match their outfits. They wear them to raise awareness and to educate and more often than not because they have emotional ties to the cause.

Your lack of tact is astonishing... kind of. In the little time that you have lived here my jaw has dropped a dozen or so times at what has come out of your mouth. I am not one for confrontation so I have let many things slide. I cannot believe I didn’t stand up for myself and tell you the harsh truth yesterday, I guess I was just so blown away that I couldn’t find the words!

You flicked my ribbon and asked what it was for. I told you it was for Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness and Remembrance Day and thought that I may be able to share my story with you. Instead of inquiring further you hit the rose bud and said, “Between you and me, you really should move that ribbon up higher. It looks like you have a big nipple on your chest.”

Are you fucking kidding me?

I looked at you and then at my ribbon and let you know that if I put it up any higher it would be on my shoulder. That is when you said you had to go home to get dinner ready.

You turned around and whistled your way home and I turned around and cried. And continued crying. And I am still crying about it.

You hurt me like no one has since losing Claire and you don’t even know it... that is my fault for not telling you right then and there that I had a potentially life threatening ectopic pregnancy 6 years ago and then gave birth to my sleeping beauty just a year ago.

Would learning this information have opened your eyes? Would you have felt as shitty as you made me feel? Or possibly worse? I am not usually vindictive but I certainly hope that is how you would feel.

You tainted my whole evening. I was sad and lonely enough not having Andrew in town to celebrate the Wave of Light with me. You made it so much worse... on both of us. Andrew was absolutely infuriated to hear how badly you hurt me. I could hardly look at my candles and take pictures through my tears. And that was mostly due to you.

You need to learn.
You need to be put in your place.
It’s called compassion.
Or empathy, if you will.

Signed smashed up and broken hearted,

No x’s and hearts and o’s for you.

PS. My best friend thinks that YOU look like the giant walking tit.
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