Monday, March 29, 2010

Ouch, that stings...

William was looking at some family pictures in our entryway this afternoon and was telling his brother and friends that in one picture he was in my tummy and in another Matthew was in my tummy. He then looked at me and asked,

“Mommy? Why we didn’t die in your tummy?” 

Wow. Where did that come from?

I told him it was because him and his brother have strong hearts.

I didn’t know what else to say?! His question totally threw me off and stabbed at my heart a little.

I am never sure how much Claire’s death plays on the kid’s minds. I want them to remember her and talk about her yet I get this momentary sting whenever they ask about her. They are innocent questions and I am glad they ask and that they can learn from her little life however like kids do, they ask outright, they are blunt, they want an answer... and with Claire, there really is no answer so it makes it confusing and difficult at times to find the right words.

All I can do is be honest and encourage them to keep asking... even if it hurts me to try to find an answer at times.

It brings me joy to know that at such a young age, our children are very aware that they have a little sister and that they want to know everything there is to know about her. Ahh... I love them!!  xoxoxo
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