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| [image courtesy of Davide Restivo] |
I read the following line in a fellow BLM's post a couple of weeks ago:
"I don't remember what I thought about before I thought about her."
It has made me really wonder? I am sure there were many, many things on my mind at any given minute but since losing Claire it seems as though any spare second I have is filled with her.
The wishes.
The what-ifs.
The if-onlys.
The what-should-bes.
The never-will-bes.
The future.
The void of her loss has taken up so much space in my head.
If she were here she would take up a lot of the space too, I know, but instead of getting caught up in thoughts I would just be living.
Hm. Who really puts the time into thinking about or analyzing why they are thinking about something? Just another BLM thing, I guess.
Hmm. It def has taken a lot of space in my head too
ReplyDeleteA mother's job is to dream for her children; there is no shame in dreaming for all of your children,even the ones that can't be here on earth with us.
ReplyDeleteI find myself thinking about Claire quite often actually, even though I never met her. So I figure that as her mother you should be allowed to think of her every second of every day no questions asked.
I'm so sorry that this is a worry in your life. Yet another thing that no mother should have to worry about I suppose.
Sending lots of love.