Saturday, March 26, 2011

All that different?

“We ought not to try quantify and measure grief. What you feel is real and you have the right to feel that. It is for you to decide how hard it really is. Don't let others tell you that your loss is less painful than someone else's loss. Though the circumstances of how the loss occurred might be very different, what is the same is the human condition of suffering and sorrow. Typically, people will make an assumption that the length of the pregnancy relates to the amount of grief that you will feel. Therefore the belief follows: a 9 month pregnancy loss is worse than a 3 month pregnancy loss which is worse than a 2 week pregnancy loss. You cannot measure the amount of attachment and love by the size of the body or the length of time you have known someone. Love cannot be so easily quantified and measured. Love is love, even if it was the love of the dream and the child s/he would have been. When someone you love dies, they are gone from this earth and it is natural to miss them, grieve for them and seek ways to keep them alive in your heart...Are miscarriage and stillbirth really all that different?”

~Sherry Jimenez


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