Claire died at 16 weeks gestation.
We didn’t know it until a week later
when her heartbeat could not be detected and was then confirmed by
ultrasound and further followed up through her autopsy report.
Today I am 16 weeks along with my Cinco.
I shouldn’t be 16 weeks pregnant again so soon.
It shouldn’t physically be probable(?)
I should be holding my 5 month old...
not 4 months pregnant.
I haven’t been around much, I know. My desire to write is low. My desire to comment on what others are writing is low.
I just cannot wrap my head around my
grief and my happiness. It is too much to balance. So much so that I
find I am just numb about both babies. I don’t feel as though I am being
fair to either!
Grieving Claire?
Where did that go?
Growing excitement for our growing baby?
When will that appear?
I feel so cheated this time around.
It’s unfair that I feel so little emotion.