I stand corrected...

Photo credit: imagineletters.com

Matthew went to a birthday party today for a classmate I had not yet met. His mother and I spoke briefly on the phone so she could fill me in on party plans and today I met her face to face. We began discussing the craziness of party planning (she had one son celebrating today, has another next weekend and another little guy she will plan for later in the year). I told her that I could relate to the busyness of family life and she then asked how many children I have...

Eek, one of the most difficult answers for a BLM to respond to!

I said 4 for simplicity sake and Matthew looked up at me and said, "No mommy, 5!" I smiled down at him and said, "Yes, you're right baby." He then turned and ran in to join his friends. I looked up at the little man of honor's mom and she was looking back with a puzzled expression so I added, "We also had a little girl who was born too soon." She looked a little taken aback however offered her condolences and continued the conversation in a comfortable and easy manner which I was very thankful for.

My caring and concerned little boy correcting me?!...
What a kind big brother...
What a sweet soul...

Today, Matthew's honesty and his buddy's mother's willingness to continue on without missing a beat made me smile inside. I am proud of Matthew for stating the not so obvious and not worrying about how it would make others feel (like his mommy would!) and it felt so good to include Claire, just as she should be.

Claire's flag in Australia...

Back in September I completed Claire's Beach Prayer flag and sent it off to CarlyMarie in Australia to participate in this beautiful event in honor of October 15th Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.

CarlyMarie, at last count, had received approximately 350 prayer flags from all over the world. Each and every one unique and made with and abundance of love. Looking through the albums is heartbreaking and stunning. To see these amazing flags you can look through the albums posted on her FB page.

I am constantly amazed by CarlyMarie's creativity and generosity. She went way above and beyond by taking on such a huge project and I am thankful for her taking the time out of her very busy evenings to spend a little time remembering our babies with us by setting up such a wonderful display and photographing our flags for us.

Beautiful.

Claire's piece of 'The Rock'...

A little background... 

When I was first born my grandfather and grandmother were in the very beginning stages of building a log cabin. Over the first couple of years, I spent some time out there 'helping' to build the foundation. We moved away when I was 2 so I don't have many memories however I have seen some photos of me around the wood piles and I do remember when visiting one summer catching minnows at the lake in a (red or yellow?) milk jug while work went on around me. Helpful, right?!

Over the course of 20 years my grandparents put their blood, sweat and tears into building this home. Cutting and bleaching each log, building the cabin from the ground up, inside and out. From the foundation to the parquet hardwood floors to the kitchen cabinets, they built it all. They hand picked each and every rock that surrounds the bottom outside of the cabin as well as each rock for the amazing fireplace wall. They have a beautiful piece of knotted wood that has been incorporated into the archway to the living room. The log home is a piece of art and a huge part of our family's history.
 
Fast forward to 2 summers ago...

My mom, sister, aunt and cousins were all up at the cabin with my grandparents and my mom and grandfather went for a walk together. As they approached the shed behind the cabin my grandfather brought my mom over to a boulder in the yard. The rock has always been there, my mom remembers seeing the kids climb on it and play around it but it wasn't until that day that my grandfather pointed something unique and completely incredible out to her. He told her to look closely as running through this boulder is a large pink vein. He told her that in order to best see it they should pour water on it... so they did and the pink vein in the rock forms a massive heart!  

My mom instantly thought of Claire. She's not sure how she never noticed the big pink heart before but figured that since Claire's winks were starting to show themselves in the most fabulous ways that maybe that is why it came to be seen at that time.

My family all shared the special sighting with me that summer over the phone and promised me a picture but forgot to get one! This past summer when they went back they talked about it once more and then 'didn't get an opportunity to get a picture' again... except they did! My aunt took a photo and my cousin, through the magic of Photoshop, made it black and white leaving the pink vein that runs through it so that the heart would really pop. They then had it enlarged and printed onto a canvas for me.

Incredible!

To add to the story, a couple of years ago the little town where their cabin is located decided that they should name the roads as it was becoming a little more populated so they came to my grandfather and asked him what he thought the name of the road should be as he was the first on the road and had been around for so many years. He chose the name Angel Road (apparently after a little dog named Angel that lived nearby) and his place is number 1. I am not really one for angels, and am not religious at all but think it is still a pretty amazing coincidence that this all fell together this way!

One of the best gifts I have received, by far. So incredibly thoughtful and meaningful to me that my family thought of Claire when they saw this boulder and so fabulous that they all worked together to to surprise me knowing how very much it would touch me to "bring" the boulder to me. 

And as if the picture wasn't enough, my aunt also typed up a sweet message to be placed in behind the canvas too. Ahh...

  

Now if I could get my whole family to Newfoundland (a.k.a The Rock) to see her rock it would just be the icing on the cake!

December lovin'...

Thank you to Amber, Anne, Antoinette, Cally, Carrie, Emalee, Jennifer G, Jennifer Y, Kamey, Kara, Kim, Lina, Melissa, Michelle, Monica, Tiffany and Virginia for Claire's end of the year winks!

With thanks from Face2Face Yellowknife...

As we say goodbye to 2012, I would like to take the opportunity to give thanks to many...

To you all, those who keep up to date here on my blog as well as our 'likers' on Facebook, for joining us this year and for helping to lend support to one another, we appreciate you beyond words. I wish from the bottom of my heart that this group was not a much needed part of your life or that of a loved one but am grateful for the opportunity to be a small part in your comfort and healing as well as a part of helping you help a family member or friend through a very difficult time in their life.

A big thank you to my co-leader Jennifer for helping to make this group a reality. We shared many doubts, fears and tears in the beginning stages but I know I can speak for us both when I say that those feelings have been overshadowed with gratitude towards you all for making this group a safe, comforting, empathetic and caring space for women and families who have been struck by the tragic loss of one or many precious babies who have left their lives too soon.

We have Galit Rodan (The Yellowknifer), Diana Carolina (CKLB Radio), as well as Allison Devereaux (CBC Radio) to thank for approaching us and giving our stories, our cause and our group a voice.

We would also like to thank the Stanton Territorial Health Authority, the Yellowknife Health and Social Services Authority, the Yellowknife Primary Care Centre and the Frame Lake Community Health Clinic for their outstanding encouragement and support as they circulate our F2F information to those in need.

And a huge thank you to my family for being so very supportive, encouraging, as well as flexible in giving me all that I needed to make this group run smoothly and with success.

I wish you all a gentle, happy, healthy, wonderful new year. I hope that 2013 brings you all that you wish for... and then some.

With thanks beyond measure,
Jaime